21. is that old enough?

We're old enough to make a choice

yet still young in many ways

Too young to pack our bags and go

too old to want to stay.

Young enough for fun and games

Too old for carefree lives

Young enough for hopes and dreams

Yet for reality we strive.

Old enough for heartfelt pain

too young to find the cure.

Too old for childish ways of past

too young to be mature.

Old enough to fall in love

and give our hearts away.

But still too young to understand

just why we feel this way.

In case you're wondering, yes, I wrote this poem. HAHA mestila tipu.

This is taken from a snippet of poem "Somewhere in the middle" (from the Chicken Soup series kalau tak silap), once introduced to us by my English teacher back in college. Back then, I don't bother understanding. Now when this hit me again, I realized, it described me the most.

I thought at 21 a normal human being would be able to make decisions on behalf of him/herself. Apparently, I failed miserably, still. On and on again.

Feels like having an alarm signal or something from above so that You can tell me which is the right choice for me and which is not for me to follow, that way, I'd be saved from making a whole bunch of silly mistakes again and again, and, yes, again. But I guess if life's that way, humans will end up like robots, not challenged and tested by anything.

And also, I thought at 20-ish years old, people would already have control over what he/she chooses, and not questioned like a child on "why did you do it this way", "why didn't you do this","why did you say this and this", etc. Apparently, it doesn't work that way and I wonder why..

World gets weirder day by day. And my unproductive brain is having trouble assimilating with everything that's going on. sigh

on another note, ohmygoodness it's less than five weeks from now! can't wait! :D *NOT REFERRING TO THE FINALS OK HARAP MAKLUM*

just some random thoughts. don't question me, please.